N.A.G.

So I'm sitting in Japan at the world's most boring airport, Narita.

If you’ve ever flown through Japan and spent time in one of the major airline lounges here, you are bound to run across Narita Airport Guy. He is the Boeing engineer grade dude on his way to do some big time international deals. Usually fat, definitely past middle aged, dick broom (moustache), etc. Pretty typical American business guy. Let’s call him “Marlon Blando”. Picture Tom Synkowski from Office Space (the guy who has “people skills!”). No wonder the rest of the world hates us.


When you have a 4+ hour layover, your brain needs to find something creative to do. So we developed a Narita Airport Guy scoring system listed below. 1 pt for each. See how many 10’s you can find while traveling through airports around the world...........

Big USA style gut
Dick Broom (moustache)
Balding (with or without comb over)
Company logo polo shirt, tucked in of course.
Pleated Dockers with cuffs at the bottom. Minimum 3 pleats on each side. – Bonus for elastic waistband
At least one cell phone or PDA on some sort of belt mounted holder. Your pants have pockets and you’re not batman jackass! – Bonus for each item above 1
All white tennis shoes of a non-descript brand (Air Spalding, BK’s, LA Gear, etc.) – Bonus if they have grass stains from his last lawn mowing excursion.
White tube socks
Leather bomber jacket – the kind with an elastic waistband and a possible map of France on the inside
That woven belt you had in high school, stretched to handle his massive boiler spilling out of the shirt.

So far I have 2 10's and multiple 7's and above!